The Way We Were
by Dukester
Summary: Spike's reality is about to change forever as Wolfram & Hart offers him the means to get rid of his artificial redemption...but is his newfound affection for Willow stronger than the darkness in his heart?
1. Chapter 1

  
**The Way We Were... "by Dukester"**   


**_Lose yourself in a world where the monsters you dreaded as a child were more than make-believe, but a sinister part of reality._**   
**_Where your nights of slumber are constantly plagued by the thought that you will never live to see the next day._**   
**_Where the only thing scarier than what's beneath your bed is what's lurking in the corner of your room._**

**_Welcome to the Hellmouth._**

Note: The story is initially set between "Wrecked" and "Gone". 

Chapter 1 

PART I "The Scent Of Strawberries"   
  


A customary autumn breeze grazed the suave vampire's pitch black trenchcoat as he strolled through the streets of Sunnydale, California. Once the sun sets in the city located in the heart of the Hellmouth, the Nosferatus (vampires) claim the night as their own, and this unholy creature makes no exception to that rule. 

The combined ecstasies of eternal youth, inhuman strength and agility coupled with the complete absence of a moral conscience infatuates all newly-turned vampires with an overwhelming feeling of power. Despite the fact that it felt like an eternity since this particular vamp was sired, that feeling of unbridled authority over all living (or dead) creatures was not lost to him, instead amplified by the countless deathmatches and massacres he personnally brought to term. 

The need to hunt having consumed him yet again, he went out to look for his next prey(s). As he slipped into the shadows, his ego and overconfidence has started to blind his usual cat like reflexes. So much, in fact, that he barely registered a fist slamming down on his temple and knocking him a few yards back against the cold brick wall... 

"Slayer..." growled the soulless demon, until his vision cleared and he saw not the nubile form of the Chosen One, but a shadowy figure draped in a leather trenchcoat, casually smoking a cigar. 

"Bollocks, that had to hurt" remarked the assaillant with a distinct british accent as he threw away the cigar. Blood started dripping from the vampire's forehead as he slowly got up. Having eventually regained his senses, he could easily detect his opponent's absence of a soul, of any perceivable body heat, and most importantly, thanks to his refined hearing, the lack of a heartbeat... 

"Sorry mate, nothing personnal here, but a bloke's gotta vent his aggressiveness somehow, and you just happened to be in the way..." started the stranger. 

There could be no mistake now, this guy could only be... 

"Spike!" yelled the half-crazed vampire as he leapt towards his agressor with savage speed, throwing an elbow attack that was swiftly evaded by his opponent. 

"Nice to know that you newly-turned ninnies aren't ignorants when it comes to recognizing the legends." started Spike. 

"Legend? A traitor like you? scoffed the berserked vampired as he multiplied his attacks on the older and more experienced vampire. "You consort with the Slayer, pit yourself against your brethen, and caused dissension amongst vampires in the Hellmouth", spat the lunatic walking corpse as his fist finally connected with Spike's chest, causing him to double over and collapse on his knees beneath him. 

"The time you have spent as the Slayer's lapdog has made you weak. Show me your real face while I give you a one way ticket to the Styx " spat the vampire. 

He didn't, however count on Spike getting up as he delivered his speech, nor did he expect the vampire who killed two Slayers to start chuckling uncontrollably. 

Spike: Not bad mate, and here I was thinking I wouldn't get a good brawl tonight.   
With that, his facial features distorted. With haunting yellow eyes and fangs exposed, Spike revealed his true vampire nature. 

"Unfortunately, you neglected to point out the one thing that separates vampires who gets to live forever...and those who are destined to be at the receiving end of a Slayer's stake. " 

His opponent could barely see Spike's movements as his face was violently slammed on the cold stony ground, his jawbone instanly shattering, bits of fanged teeth and bloody maxillaries splattering on the ground. 

Spike: I may have had my ass spectacularly kicked around by the Slayer, but fighting vampires, demons, overzealous knights, an occasional troll demon and a really skanky hellgod on a regular basis makes kicking the asses of ninnies like you... 

On cue, he withdrew Buffy's favorite stake that he swipped among with a few of her unmentionnables and shoved it through the defeated vampire's heart. 

"Almost too easy". 

As the vampire explosed in a cloud of dust, Spike went over the results of his nightly "patrol": 5 vampires, all brandishing their own epic speeches, and 1 Serpavo demon, which he wrestled with for almost half an hour until he remembered that they can only be killed by drowning. 

"All in all, an uneventful night", thought Spike. He felt dismayed by the fact that ever since that fateful night where he and Buffy litterally rocked the house, nothing in his daily (nightly, to be accurate) routine gave him the same level of satisfaction it used to.   
Nothing surprising really, considering the fact the while a Slayer's blood is a powerful aphrodisiac, her sexual...aromas had to be at least twice as addicting. 

So...finally realizing that the only thing that can quench his lusts could be found in neither the thrill of the hunt or the predominant need to feed, the true ruler of the night hid himself in the cover of shadows and disappeared into the darkness of the alley... and towards the Summers's house. 

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"There shouldn't be anyone in the Summers's residence besides Buffy, her brat sister Dawn and her best friend Willow, at least this late in the night anyway", thought Spike as he skillfully leapt on the window sill leading to the Slayer's room from a nearby tree, a useful tactic used by the Slayer during her teenage years to keep her nightly patrols a secret from her mother. 

Of course, he could have entered the house by conventional means, if not for the fact that he'd rather be staked then to be subjected to Dawn's trademark teenage mood swings, or to have to listen to Willow sulk and whine about how her gay lover Tara left her because she abused the use of magicks. 

As he slid the window open, he felt a wave of nausea overcome him: Buffy's room was packed with crosses and garlic! realized Spike as he lost hold of the window's grip and sunk like a rock some stories below... 

"Bloody heeellllllllll" managed to yell the luckless vampire as he crashed flat on his back and lost consciousness...   


************************************************************************************************ 

"The smell of strawberries..." muttered Spike as he came to and his mind started to recollect all the events leading to where he was...until the thought of an intoxicatingly sweet aroma clued him in that he had a pleasant dream while he passed out, that and the huge hard-on he had. 

The more he tried to recall his brief lapse into dreamland, the more the racking pain in his head seemed to intensify. "Bloody rot!" cursed the blond vampire as he was going insane from both the searing headache and the infatuating aroma. 

Nonetheless, Spike temporarily kept these strange thoughts aside as he was trying to figure out a way to get inside the Slayer's house, since the first hints of a big thunderstorm are showing. Now...besides the Slayer's chambers, he could try to break into Joyce's bedroom, empty since Buffy and Dawn's mum passed away. That is if he wanted to risk breaking his leg while trying to jump over a half a dozen meters from the Slayer's window. 

Now, he could also break into Willow or Dawn's room, but he knew that Buffy would crucify him if she found him in her 15 year-old sister's bedroom, asleep, in her nightie, with dirty thoughts (of Buffy...duh) in his mind... 

That leaves Willow's room, although he's not too keen on the thought of her freaking out and turn him into a frog either...except that she probably wouldn't, knowing her erratic phobia of frogs. 

"Wait a minute, how do I know about her frog fear?" wondered Spike as he mentally scolded himself for having spent way too much time with these geeks and losing his Big Bad attitude. 

It was then that he noticed the perfect way of breaking in: the bathroom window was left open. He contemplated the thought of breaking and entering while Buffy was showering or undressing, but remembering the unhealthy "surprise" she left him in her room, he quickly dismissed the thought. 

Perfect. No one is in there. Spike swiftly slipped in and opened the bathroom door.   
Oddly, the house was relatively unlit. Furthermore, his enhanced hearing couldn't perceive any sounds inside the house, save for the sounds of the telly in the living room. What was certain was that no one was sleeping in the living room, or else he'd hear Buffy's incessant snoring, Dawn yapping over the phone, or the sound of Willow choking her tears in her sleep. 

"Choking her tears in her sleep" pondered Spike as his thoughts returned to the cheerful redhead. It's not like these past events, with Buffy dying, having to take care of her grieving sister, patrolling and silently mourning together didn't make them feel closer. Even then, defining their relation as friendship was pushing it...in a way where both of them would tear the eyes from the sockets out of anyone who would dare make that assumption. 

Actually, Willow would just give that person a huge fit, and after feeling guilty for a few days she would bake him cookies and make it all better. Spike chuckled. Yep...that's what she would do. 

She always extended her smile to everyone (including him, even if he tried to kill her a good...half-dozen times) that he barely ever saw her ever get angry. It was then that Spike realized how the use of magicks had changed this once docile creature into something capable of causing great pain to her enemies...and her friends. He could think of no other reason that could explain why she have threathened Giles after he had exposed to her the dangerous repercussions of bringing back Buffy from the dead. 

Thinking back, he also noticed how nobody had thanked her, and how she had to bear all the burden and guilt of tearing Buffy from heaven, the latter unbeknownst to her of course. 

"Bugger that. I just can't wait to get rid of this chip those government nancy-boys put inside me so I can just kill all of these stupid bints and not have to care about their feelings..." joked Spike half-heartedly, which, for a brief moment, make him afraid of his true nature... 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

As he stealthily made his way downstairs, he felt somewhat comforted by a familiar scent which seemed to be present in his mind lately. As he made his way into the living room, all distractions brought on by the noises of the television, its reflecting light, whoever Rachel is shagging this week...all of that simply stopped existing as Spike laid his eyes on the vision of absolute loveliness in front of him on the couch... 

Willow was lying dormant before him, her lower body wrapped by sheets, her droopy eyes resting peacefully, like an untainted angel. From the slight disarray of her makeup and the clear liquid leaking between her pink cheeks, he could tell that she had been crying for...about half an hour before finally dozing off into sleep. 

Spike knew that the sight of this kindest of creatures, so vulnerable and fragile, a creature so innocent yet in such silent suffering would just MELT the heart of any child, woman, or man. Barely qualifying as a man, Spike just felt a strange sensation in his chest as he could swear he just heard his heart beat...except that the feeling he just described was lost to him ever since he became a vampire.. 

Time stopped for the vampire as he felt the seconds and minutes pass right before his eyes while gazing at the young woman. Why he couldn't divert his sight from her he can't explain, but the only certitude Spike had was that even if his chip was removed, he would shield her from pain for as long as they both shall live...   


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PART II "The chance to start over"...   
  
  
  


Mesmerized by the look of serenity on Willow's face, Spike suddenly broke out of his reverie when he noticed her rolling around on the couch, a pained look on her face as her tired pupils finally opened and her delicate lips ushered: 

"Tara..." 

Despite the fact that the single word that Willow spoke was almost a silent whisper, Spike could hear it as clearly as the sound of fingernails on a chalkboard. He could also sense all the pain behind it, and it didn't take a genius to figure out what kind of dream she just had... 

His train of thought was suddenly interrupted when he saw Willow reach for a handful of Kleenex tissues on the table and hastily dried her abundant tears. 

"Spike...what are you...(sniff) doing here?" mumbled Willow while she tried to catch her breath between every word she spoke. 

Spike promptly turned around, both in order to keep her from feeling embarassed and because watching her cry made him feel uneasy. 

"Umm...telly's broke down at the crypt. Figured everyone would be tucked in their comfy beds right about now..." 

"Speaking of which, where's Buff and the little bit?" inquired Spike. 

Willow: Dawn's staying over at Janice tonight, or at least that's what she told us anyway.   
Buffy is...out at the Bronze with Xander and Anya, she said she had to get her mind off things...which translates to partying to the wee hours of the morning. 

Spike: And you figured: this would be a good time to stay at home alone and sulk... 

It was then that he noticed the two bottles of beer rolling around, a few feet from where he was standing. 

"And apparently, getting drunk of your ass", continued Spike. 

Willow shot him a pissed off look, which ended up making him smile more than anything else. 

Willow: Lay off, my friends never let me drink anything because they think I'm just drowning my sorrow with beer. You don't know what kind of pain... 

"I'm not one of your frien..." started Spike, before realizing what he just said. 

An eternity of awkward silence seemed pass as Spike tried to avoid looking at Willow, imagining how much he just hurt her feelings. 

"Will..." started Spike. 

"Leave me alone", replied Willow as she hid her face between her sheets. 

Spike: That's it, we're going to the Bronze. Once we get your lesbian hands on some nice piece of ass... 

"Pretty soon you'll be going - Tara who?". 

Judging from Willow's reaction, or lack of it, he guessed it didn't cheer her up any. 

Willow: Look, if you're not going to watch TV, go home. 

"And abandon me like everyone else has." muttered Willow. 

"She actually bought my reason for coming here?", chuckled Spike. Truth be told, he'd rather be anywhere than here. Even if he was fond of her, it was obvious that she didn't want him here, and there was no feeling he despised more than that. 

As he got up and headed towards the door, the sound of choked tears filled the room anew. 

"Rot..." said Spike quietly as he walked back and sat right next to Willow, below the couch where she was still covered under her sheets. 

As he got closer, the sweet scent of Willow's red hair made it hard for him to concentrate on anything else. He aimlessly zapped through the channels, looking for anything, ANYTHING, that could break the silence between them. 

After changing channels for 15 minutes, Spike decided it was time for a break. 

Spike: Listen...I'm going to get something to drink. 

"Don't go and start the party without me or anything..." muttered Spike. 

He didn't really need to soothe his thirst for blood, but he WAS in a dire need to get wasted. 

"Completely and utterly...wasted" thought Spike. 

Things didn't get better once he opened the fridge. 

Spike: Bugger this. Sodding american booze... 

During his quest for hard liquor, Spike heard Willow yell out things in her sleep. 

"Loony bint..." mumbled Spike as he made out the words coming out of her mouth. 

Placebo...entropy...quasar... 

Spike returned to the living room about 5 minutes later, sporting a sizeable bottle of brandy. He was quite surprised when he realized Willow was yelling answers at the TV. It turns out that before he went to the kitchen, he left the channel to the show "The Weakest Link". 

"Good old Anne Robinson", thought Spike. Who'd have figured that watching a crazy british bitch demeaning those poor saps would actually lift her morale up, 

Willow: Spike! 

-What? 

Willow: Where'd you get that bottle of brandy? 

Spike: Funny you should ask. One of you gals hid it in a storage compartment in the basement. 

Willow: The one next to the boxes marked "Joyce"? 

Spike: Yeah...and? 

Willow shot him a "duh!" glance. 

"Oh", said Spike as he uncorked the tip open. 

Willow: What the hell are you doing? Put that back before Buffy kills you! 

Spike: Relax pet. Joyce must have wanted to use this to celebrate special occasions. With you boo-hoo-ing about your break-up... It wouldn't have bothered her if we made good use of it... 

Willow: "We"? 

Spike: Hey! Buffy's mum always made sure I had a good cup of tea or a decent glass of wine everytime I stopped by. She would be rolling over in her grave if she found out I didn't have anything else to drink than american beer. 

He proceeded to drink a few gulps of brandy. 

Spike: That lady had fine taste indeed. 

Willow: Gimme! 

***************************************************************** 

They spent the next twenty minutes or so taking turns getting shots from the bottle, while yelling answers at the top of their lungs at the TV. At some point, Willow perched her head on Spike's shoulder, in order to get her drinking turn as soon as Spike was done with his. Her beautiful hair, just inches from his nose, had the most lovely scent. Spike had a hard time focusing on crazy old Anne driving the contestants on the edge of insanity. 

"Fyarll demons! shouted Spike. 

Willow: You're crazy! 

Spike: What? It's the bleeding truth. 

Willow: Like they're going to say, on National television, that Fyarll demons desecrated Serbian shrines. 

Spike: Just you wait then. 

... 

Spike: Albanians?!! Piffle. 

Willow: It's all right Spike. I believe you... 

Two seconds later, he forgot whatever made him angry in the first place. 

Spike: Bugger, we're out of booze. I'll go get us some (hiccup) more... 

Willow: No need to get up, I'm on it. 

He spent the next ten seconds staring at her, waiting for her to move. 

Spike: Um...wouldn't you have to...I'm taking a wild guess here...get up in order to get the aforementionned booze? 

Willow: Here it is! 

Spike: What in the bloody hell are you babbling about? 

Then he noticed two bottles of vodka in front of him...except that they're floating in mid-air. 

Spike: Will... 

"Too slow! chirped Willow as she took first choice of the alcoholic beverages. 

She cheerfully drinked half a pint of vodka until she noticed the gloomy look on Spike's face. 

"What's wrong with you?" inquired Willow. 

"Was it just me or did the booze suddenly find a way to reverse the laws of gravity?" joked Spike. 

Willow: What are you talking about? I telepathically moved it here. Sorry if it took so long, I'm a little out of it right now... 

Spike: Didn't you swear off magicks...like 4 days ago? 

Willow: Please...it was harmless. And nobody saw me do it anyway. 

Spike: Thanks a lot. 

Willow: You know what I mean. You don't get on my case like the others. 

Spike let out a long, unnecessary breath as he gathered his thoughts and started venting out. 

-Look, I really didn't want to this, especially after the good time we've just spent together, but you have to realize what breaking your resolution means. 

Willow: I don't know what you're talking about... 

Spike: Wake up red. Your friends...I mean Buffy, Xander and Dawn, they would never come out and tell you how serious your problem is, but I certainly don't mind doing it. 

Willow: Will you just let it go? Nobody was hurt. 

Spike: You just don't get it. Even if nobody was hurt, what you are using is dangerous, and the effect it has on you is something that you can't deny. 

Willow: No, you're the one that doesn't get it. You're have no idea what you're talking about. I help people... 

Spike: You also hurt people, your friends among others. 

Willow: I never... 

Spike: Enough with the bleeding denial! When you had your will done, you put peoples's lives in danger. And just last week, we all nearly got killed because of your little amnesia spell. Did you forget why Tara... 

Suddenly, Spike felt the air between them thicken, and it suddenly got very...very cold. 

Spike: Will? 

Then he saw the look on her faces...her eyes mostly -and he suddenly felt more afraid of Willow than he ever felt against the Slayers he met. 

"Pitch black, like death itself" thought Spike. 

Before he could continue, the bottle of brandy swirled around at an incredible speed and violently slammed itself the wall, shattering into a thousand pieces. 

Spike: Will... 

-Shut up, Spike. 

Spike: One of these days you'll end up killing someone you love. 

Now it wasn't funny anymore. Spike felt as if he was light as a feather as everything in the room, except for him and Willow, started floating and spinning. Her energy may be unstable, but Spike knew she could easily tear his atoms apart, desintegrating him like she did to that demon after she went joyriding with Dawm. It was obvious she was very angry...and in a great deal of pain. 

"Tadpoles..." muttered Spike, loudly enough so she could hear. 

The room suddenly stopped moving as energetically. He finally established a link between Willow's subconscious and himself. 

"Now, you may not like what you are about to hear, but someone has to open your eyes to the truth. If you are going to tear me apart afterwards...at least I'll go down fighting." 

Willow stared at him with those dark empty eyes of hers, piercing his stomach with her gaze. 

-I don't give a damn what you... 

Spike: You better give a damn, because someone should have told you this a long time ago. 

"No one pretended that fighting the good fight was going to be easy. It hasn't helped that you have been exposed and been able to wield so much power at such a young age. And believe me, your friends are grateful for all the help you lent them during these past 6 years", started Spike. 

"But something's changed inside you. Back then, you would feel guilty everytime you inavertedly hurt someone through the use of magick. Remember when you used to bake chocolate chip cookies when your will was done and demons almost teared us apart? Now you barely shrug your shoulders when Tara found out you erased memories from her mind." 

"None of the bleeding Scoobies told you how offended and utterly pissed they were when you gave us amnesia. You robbed us of our identity, our memories...our life. Without that, we cease to exist." 

Willow: I didn't mean to... 

Spike: I know you didn't, that it was an "accident". Still, how many more accidents will occur before it becomes fatal? How many more before there's no going back? 

Spike: Why did you want to stop using magicks in the first place? 

Willow: Because I want Tara back...more than anything. 

Spike: That's not a good enough reason. 

Willow was flushed. 

Willow: How dare you... 

Spike: Don't get me wrong, I don't doubt your feelings for her, or your sincerity. 

Spike: But what I'm telling you is this: as long as you don't do it for anybody other than yourself, you'll keep   
slipping until you breach the point of no return. 

Willow: You don't know that. 

Spike: I know a lot more than you think. Me and my 128 plus years. 

Willow: You can't help me... 

Spike: I know you better than you give me credit for. 

Willow: Is that right? 

Spike: Go back to the time when you didn't know what hatred meant. 

Willow: ... 

Spike: A time when you didn't know how to cast a single spell. When your definition of fun was waiting for Monday in order for classes to start. When the only books you read weren't magic books. When you were the resident hacker of Sunnydale. When your daily cares weren't about hunting demons or killing vampires, but studying for mid-terms and struggling to get your that bloke Xander's attention...the kind person you were before you had a taste of power. 

Tears were now streaming down Willow's face. 

Willow: ... Would Tara love that person? 

Spike: I'm sure that's it's the person...that she fell in love with in the first place. 

Willow: Would you ... love her? 

Spike remained speechless. Timed seemed to stop just for them until he noticed Willow's eyes reverting back to the way they were. 

Willow: I can't do this alone... 

Spike: You'll never be alone, as long as you have your friends with you. 

They both smiled at each other. 

Tears quietly streamed down Willow's eyes again as she started to fall down. 

There must have been a discontinuity in time, because the next thing he knew, his arms were wrapped around Willow. 

Spike: Shhhh... 

They stood together like that, the warmth of her tears making him feel like he wasn't an undead creature, but a living, breathing man...for a brief moment. 

Willow barely managed a reaction when she felt Spike press his cold lips against hers...until she relunctantly kissed back.   
A few seconds later though, she broke their sweet embrace. 

Willow: Spike...I...we can't do this. 

Spike: Sorry...I know. You left boy's town a while ago. 

Spike: It's just that...I love your quirks, the funny way you talk...the sweet scent of your hair... 

As he motionned to kiss her again, Willow turned her face around. 

Spike: It's alright. I get the message. 

He sighed heavily as he tried to come up with something to say.   
Willow finally broke the silence. 

Willow: I felt it too. 

Spike: Felt what? 

Willow: The time where you kidnapped me in order to get Drusilla back... and when you attacked me in my dorm room. 

Spike: I still don't know what you're talking ab... 

Willow: The tension between us. The connection we had. I was afraid for my life, but deep down... 

Spike: ...inside, the scent you give when you're afraid...it infatuated me. 

Spike: Does that mean that you also... 

Spike: feel the same way? 

They were looking at each other straight in the eyes now, both quivering slightly from the years they spent ignoring these feelings they knew but always denied, had but never explored... 

Willow: Spike...the answer to that question... 

Spike: Yes? 

Willow: The day when that chip of yours is removed, you will know if these feelings you have for me are true or not. 

Willow: Until then, what we have or may have had...will always be a faraway dream or a distant fantasy. 

Willow: The day you know for sure, come see me...and I'll give you my answer. 

Spike was speechless. He could barely register all that have been said these past minutes...until Willow held his hand with her delicate fingers. 

Spike: Until that day comes... 

Willow: Until then...this will have to do. 

Their lips brushed softly at first, then their kiss became increasingly passionate. 

To make this ephemery moment...last a lifetime. 

They both had a hard time separating themselves from one another. It was only a full minute later that they managed to get out of each other's tight embrace. 

Spike: Right then... 

Willow: Yea... 

The familiar feeling of tension filled the room again until Spike broke the silence. 

Spike: Night is still young. How about we join those crazy youngsters at the Bronze? 

Willow feigned a pensive look for a second, but she was obviously too tired to accept his invitation. 

-Maybe next time. I think I'll call it a night for now, right after I clean up all this mess I've made. 

As soon as she uttered those words, Willow went to the kitchen, and about 30 seconds later, emerged with a broom and a disposal basket. 

"She just might make it..." thought Spike. 

While watching her carefully picking up the small pieces of glass and neatly rearranging the items on the shelves and on the table, Spike realized that she now had the strength of will to overcome her addiction. 

Spike: So...you'll be alright? Alone all night? 

Willow: I'll be fine, thanks. You go and have fun. 

She followed him to the door stand, and fearing they both won't be able to control themselves, they simply waved each other goodbye as Spike slowly disappeared...into the cover of darkness. 

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"Bleeding...maggots" yelled Spike as he disembolwed the last of the three Chaos demons he fought. While he told her he would   
meet up with the Scoobies at the Bronze, Spike needed something to get his mind out of Willow. Even drenched from head to toe with demon gore, he still couldn't get her aroma out of his brain. 

"Why does this always happen to me?" muttered Spike as he drank a pint of the vodka he swiped while Willow went to get the   
broom. 

-I wonder what that nancy-boy Warren is doing right about now. A Willow-bot sure sounds like a good idea...(hiccup). 

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THE END...?   


Author's note: Wow, my first complete work of fanfic is finally done. What got me to start writing about W/S?   
The bastardization of the Spike character in season 6 , the tasteless and offensive portrayal of Buffy and Spike's relationship, some missing stuff on the Willow addiction storyline... 

Mostly, it's just the incredible chemistry between Alyson Hannigan and James Marsters in the aforementionned scenes in S3 "Lover's Walk" and that S4 episode where Spike got chipped...those crazy kids sure can light up the screen. 

As with most writers, I live on feedback. email me at thatvietguy@hotmail.com if you have any feedback...at all. Even 2 lines mean the world to me. So keep em coming. You'll be guaranteed a reply. 

I had loads of fun writing this, and a true sequel sure sounds neat...maybe at the end of this or the 7th season, so I can get a better glimpse at where Joss is going with the boy's town/lesbian angle, and what happens with Spike's chip and "redemption". 

Finally, massive thanks to you, the reader, for reading this story and keeping the flame of the W/S ship alive...tell your friends about this story! 

That's all for now! 

Pce 

Dukester 


	2. Chapter 2: Facing The World

  
Chapter 2 

PART III "Facing The World" 

Spike's reality is about to change forever as the demon law firm Wolfram & Hart offers him the means to get rid of his artificial redemption...but is love stronger than the darkness in one's heart?   


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Spike shuddered despite himself as he felt the sun rising and the first rays of daylight pierce the darkness of the night. It has been like this every single night of the past 128 years of his existence, this...instinctual reaction to the rise of his oldest and most fearsome enemy, the only one he has never been able to hurt and the only one whom he will never get the best of. 

Spike stared emptily at the ceiling of his crypt as his thoughts were lost amidst the perpetual motion of time, how every night the moon would cast its blessings on the creatures of the night, to hunt, to terrorize...to kill. 

And how every day the sun would rise and banish them out of man's realm, and the cycle would continue forever, until finally mankind itself would be consumed and become extinct. Nothing ever changes, not really anyway. A slayer dies, another is called to die in her place. Angelus...Adam...Glory...not a bleeding difference between any of them. 

And the humans, they're as bad as demons, every one of them. They hide their real nature, under the guise of acting virtuously. Those government nancy-boys, that bloke Ben...they're all doing whatever's in their best interest. Sodding hypocrites... 

Then his eyes diverted from the ceiling and when he closed them, all he could see was Willow. The smell of her hair, the softness of her skin, the warmth of her touch...it was etched in his mind, in the depths of his nerves, buried in the electrical pulses of the chip. 

-These feelings...are they mine...or the chip's? 

"I love her", he said aloud. But only the echos heard him, only the walls cared enough to listen, but none believed him. And more than ever, the crypt felt empty...so horribly empty. 

*********************************************************************   


Usually at this time of the day, he would sit in front of the telly and spend the day immersing himself into his soap operas. As luck would have it, however, yesterday's thunderstorm seemed to have busted the transmission, thus limiting his daily activies to staring at the ceiling...and cursing how rotten this world is. Pretty ironic, since his excuse for sneaking inside Buffy's house the night before was exactly that. 

Suddenly, the sound of footsteps travelling down the crypt's staircase reawakened his vigilance and he instinctively took hold of the nearest hurling axe he could find. 

-Must be that loan shark again, that crook and his half-wit goons have another thing coming to them if they think I'll just... 

Spike's chain of thought was interrupted by the creaking sound of the wooden door opening, and as he motionned to propel the weapon at his unsuspecting visitors, a terrible pain started racking his brain and he let out a blood curling scream as he faded into unconsciousness and blacked out.   


*********************************************************************   
  


"Spike, what happened?" 

A distinctively pleasant and sweet voice greeted his return to the land of the living as Spike opened his eyes and realized he was lying on the floor, his head coddled comfortably on Willow's lap, her gentle fingers caressing his forehead. 

"What...Will? Is this a dream? Am I dead?" 

Willow looked at him with quiet concern. A few seconds later, she had a hard time keeping a straight face. 

"You should have seen the look on your face when you came to. It's a good thing the gypsies didn't curse you, because, honest to God, I've never seen anyone as happy to see me like you were." 

Spike was oddly embarassed, but he never felt mroe comfortable, never more at home and at peace with his human nature than he did now, resting comfortably on her lap, her loving arms wrapped around his head. 

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see what she was wearing. A lovely fuschia dress with a pretty flower motif, coupled with a light red blazer. 

Willow: Does it still hurt? 

Spike: Any pain is withstandable, especially if you're here to share it with me. 

Willow slightly rolled her eyes at his reply, but the look on Spike's face assured her that he wasn't kidding. 

Willow: Very funny...speaking of which. 

Willow: What's up with the seizure act? 

Spike: Um...It must have been the chip. Sodding piece of junk... 

He diverted his eyes to the throwing axe a few feet away. 

Willow: I don't understand. You were trying to throw it at me? 

Spike got on his feet and vigourously denied it. 

"God no...I would never..." started Spike. 

"Spike, calm down. I know it was an accident. It's just that usually...the chip reacts less violently", quietly started Willow. 

The vampire turned his back abruptly and exhaled sharply. 

Spike: I know. On top of that, you're not the kind of visitor I usually get. 

Spike: Most of the time...it's just demons trying to settle the score with me, or hustlers coming to collect my debts. 

Willow: I didn't know you had financial problems. 

A slightly evil grin formed itself on Spike's lips. 

Spike: It's not really what you think. 

Willow: What do you mean? 

Spike: I don't think you want to know. 

Willow: Come on! 

She talks as if he had the willpower to refuse her anything. 

Spike: I have a gambling problem. 

Willow: I can hook you up with some useful support groups. 

Spike: Somehow...I don't think there are support groups for kitty poker. 

Willow: Kitty...poker? 

Spike wasn't surprised by her reaction. 

Spike: You see...it's just like poker, except the payoff is in kittens instead of dead presidents. 

Willow: What do they do with them afterwards? 

Spike: Umm...serve them for supper, pagan sacrifices... 

Then he noticed the horrified look on her face. 

Spike: ...or, like me, they donate those helpless animals to orphans, and...uh... 

Judging by the skeptic look on her face, it was obvious she was too smart to fall for that. 

Spike: There are some things about me...that you'd be better off not knowing. 

Willow: No...I appreciate your honesty. 

She seemed a lot more docile than a while ago. 

Willow: It's just that I...Tara and I had a kitten too. We called her Miss Kitty Fantastico. 

-You have no idea how much I miss her. 

Spike took a step towards her and put a sympathetic hand on her shoulder. 

"Are you sure you're just talking about your kitten here?" inquired Spike. 

Much to his surprise, Willow leaned her face on Spike's chest. 

Willow: Of course I think about her all the time. Don't you ever think about Drusilla every now and then? 

"Dru..." reminiscied Spike. A few years ago, the mere thought of existing without his dark princess by his side would have   
been inconceivable. 

"No", coldly let out Spike. 

Willow: How could you not? You were together longer than Sonny and Cher, Tom and Nicole, Chandler and Monica... 

"She left me, not the other way around. I don't owe her anything...besides pain", continued Spike. 

This left Willow uncomfortable, to say the least. 

Willow: I wish I was strong like you...because I just can't keep myself from crying sometimes. 

Spike: It's natural at first, but after a while...pain turns to bitterness, and love turns to hate. 

At his realization that Willow was feeling uneasy, Spike decided to change the subject. 

Spike: So...what brings you here? 

Willow took an instant before recollecting her thoughts. 

-Well...I was feeling lonely at home. Buffy had a huge hangover from the night before and hit the sack the second she got home. Dawn left a message saying she'll be home late today. And since it's winter break at Sunnydale UC...I don't have any more classes. 

-So I figured I'd stop by, seeing how it must be lonesome to spend your days in this empty crypt. Lonely hearts attract, right? 

She took a short pause. 

Willow: That is, if you don't mind my company too much... 

"Nothing could be further from the truth", thought Spike. 

Spike: You're always welcome here. There's no one else I'd rather see first thing in the morning. 

Willow: How sweet of you, William. 

Her lips drew the most beautiful smile, and seemed to light up the entire room. 

"Ooh! I almost forgot", started Willow as she searched her handbag and withdrew some plastic containers. 

Willow: Later today, we can have our own little picnic. Minus the sunlight, the grass and the sitting under the tree part of it of course. 

Willow: I even bought cow's blood, fresh from the butcher. 

Spike chuckled and lightly shaked his head in disbelief. Never in a million years could he have imagined that someone would be kind   
enough to orchestrate something like this for him. 

"For a monster...like me" softly muttered Spike. 

Willow: Did you say something? 

He could see she was busy setting the items on the table and putting her blazer on a nearby table. 

Spike: Nothing you have to worry about. 

Willow: i see... 

A few seconds later, she continued. 

-You know...this place is really a pigsty. 

Spike: It's funny...Joyce said the same thing. 

Willow: Women have an eye for this sort of thing. It's an innate need to clean up after every mess the Y chromosome leaves behind. 

Spike: I'm not too sure the crypt needs the feminine touch. No offense. 

"You know...my parents would never have let me come over to a boy's house that has so much disregard to tidyness", spoke Willow   
in a sly and taunting voice. 

Spike was dumbfounded by her reply. Not only because it took him by complete surprise but also because he had the hardest time   
trying to make sense of it. Mostly, it was because this strangest of arguments actually won him over...for a reason he will never be   
able to explain. 

Spike: Make yourself at home, luv. 

************************************************************************************************   


"Bugger this", muttered Spike as he gave up trying to fix the television and rained blows on the defective machine. 

Willow: Somehow, I don't think that will help. 

Spike glanced at the redhead. She had been spending the last fifteen minutes cleaning and reorganizing the crypt, while cheerfully whistling the air of the "Dawson's Creek" 's theme song. It was hard not to pay attention to her, and even harder to look away, or to   
do anything else for that matter. 

"Unless you know a better way to get this piece of junk working, we'll be stuck without a TV", replied Spike. 

Willow: Would that be so horrible? 

Spike: But...how else will I know who the father of Rachel is? 

Willow: You're hopeless...there are other things we can do. 

Spike: Got anything in mind? It's not like we can help ourselves to doses of demon ass-kicking, not before another 8 hours or so. 

Willow: Well...got anything to read? 

He looked at her like she came from another dimension. 

"You have got to be kidding me..." chuckled Spike. 

Willow: What? You're over 128 years old. You expect me to believe that you haven't cracked open a single book during   
all that time? 

Spike: Like what? Vampire slayers for dummies? 

Spike: To tell you the truth, I haven't read a book since I was turned. 

Willow: So before... 

Spike: We were very much alike. 

She was pleasantly surprised by his revelation. 

Willow: No way...you were a man of litterature? During the 1850s? 

Spike: A poet actually. You already know what name I went by. The rest I never told to anyone...not even to Buffy. *** 

Willow: Still...I never figured you to be an intellectual. Gosh... 

-It would just be so much fun to see your works in old archives or libraries. 

Spike: Haha...over my dead body. 

He was obviously very amused by all of this, though Willow could detect a hint of embarassment on the vampire's face. 

Willow: Please? It would just be...awesome to listen to poetry written by the Big Bad Spike. 

Spike: I told you, you'd have to kill me first. 

He could see that she was disappointed to no end. 

Willow: Why not? It couldn't have been that bad. 

Spike: At the time I didn't think it was... 

Spike: ...but now it just makes me want to pummel my human self to a bloody pulp. 

Willow: You're no fun... 

Spike: Sorry... 

At this point they were just teasing each other, like life-long friends, like brothers and sisters, like soulmates... 

Willow: What did you write about? Any particular inspirations? 

Spike: Anything but that... 

Willow: I know! You wrote about a girl, didn't you? 

Spike: Too smart for me. 

Willow: What was she like? I bet she was really pretty, wasn't she? 

Spike: Actually, she reminds me of you. 

Willow: Ok...now I know you're lying. 

Spike: She was everything I used to want in a woman, save for the snobbiest and most prissy attitude I've ever seen   
in my entire life. 

Willow: And she reminds you of me? 

Spike: She was beautiful...the kind of beautiful words simply could not describe. 

Absolute silence filled the room. 

Willow: Wow... 

Spike: What? 

Willow: The thing you just said... 

Spike: Oh yea, she reminds me of you because you're the smartest girl I know. 

Spike had no clue as to why his last comment turned her larger than life smile into a frown. 

Spike: Is something wrong? 

Willow: It's nothing...forget it. 

"What the hell did I just say?" thought Spike was his mind started going through the recent conversation. 

Spike: Will...help me out here. 

She exhaled deeply, but not a word came out of her mouth as she resumed her work on the crypt. 

"Women..." thought Spike. 

"Men..." muttered Willow. 

*************************************************************************************** 

An hour passed, but time seemed to linger on infinitely as Spike casually read yesterday's newspaper. Willow was lying   
on the sofa, resting after being done with the housework half an hour ago. 

"The housework", thought Spike. 

Spike: Loved what you've done with the place. 

Willow: Thank you...would have been my reply if you've said that half an hour ago. 

Spike: Oh... 

He cursed his stupidity. 

Spike: I would despise it if Buffy said it to me...but, you know you're too good for me, right? I'm...beneath you. 

Willow remained speechless. 

Spike: I mean, you can get mad at me when I'm insensitive. It's not like I'm trying to hurt you on purpose. 

A moment later, she finally replied. 

-Shh...it's not you. I didn't get much sleep yesterday. Plus, I'm finally starting to feel the effects of all the alcohol we drank last night. 

-I just need to...rest for a bit. 

Spike got closer to her and slowly put his hands around her neck, slowly rubbing his thumb at the base of her tense neck muscles   
until he started massaging her at a slow pace. 

Spike: Why didn't you say so luv? I wouldn't have let you work yourself half to death this past hour. 

Willow: It's ok. I wanted to feel useful...especially since I don't use magic anymore. 

He leaned closer to her ear, realizing that loud and sudden noises will disturb her, and started speaking in a much softer tone. 

Spike: Putting the needs of others above your own and exhausting yourself rather than to disappoint them... 

"Umm...?" moaned Willow, half-yawning. 

Spike: You'll make an incredible wife to a lucky man someday. 

He swallowed his phlegm while he continued. 

Spike: and an even sweeter mother. 

Willow huddled her cheek against Spike's. 

Willow: Stop talking crazy...I'm a lesbian and you can't have children. 

Spike: But it's true. You have more love to give than anyone I've ever known. You even have enough... 

He paused again for a second. 

Willow: Spike? 

Spike: ...to always spare a smile for a monster like me. 

Willow: Please don't see yourself that way. You're different now. 

Spike carefully put his fingers over her pupils and gently closed them. 

Spike: It's ok...just sleep now. I'll have dinner ready when you wake up. 

Willow protested weakly at first, until she was too tired to stay awake. 

After lightly kissing her forehead, Spike got up and headed towards the kitchen.   
  


**************************************************************************************   
  


He reemerged half an hour later with a plate of food and drinks on each hand, but was surprised when he saw her staring   
at the ceiling, barely noticing his presence when he got next to her. 

Spike: Hey. 

Willow: Umm... 

Spike: Is everything alright? You seemed pensive. 

Willow: I'm fine, there's just been...a lot of things on my mind lately. 

Spike: Anything I can help you with? 

She stopped looking at the ceiling and stared at him with her deep green eyes. 

Willow: We've known each other for a long time...yet there's so much I don't know about you. 

Spike: I was just wondering the same thing. 

Willow grinned a bit. 

Willow: Two strange years...extreme circumstances... 

Spike: ...made me what I am... 

Willow: ...and brought us closer. 

Spike: Yea. 

Willow: ...and if these circumstances in question were different...and if you were never chipped... 

Spike: There's no point hypothesizing on what could or couldn't have been. I wouldn't trade what I have...for anything   
in the world. 

Willow: ...what would have become of us then? 

Spike: Will...don't do this. 

- You don't want to know. 

Willow: I **_have_** to know. 

Needing a moment of relief, he set the platters on a nearby table. 

Willow: What would you have done...that night when you were in my dorm room...where no one could hear me scream. 

Spike: I would have... 

He couldn't look at her as he muttered these words. 

Spike: ...I would have drained you right after I ravaged you. 

-Then I would have vamped you...so Buffy would have to stake the demon within the body of her best friend. 

-I was evil...in a way you could never have imagined. When you look at me... 

-...you are unable to see a slaughterer, a soulless creature intent on causing senseless pain. It's not in your   
nature...to see past someone's kindness. 

He then felt a wave of warmth overcome him as Willow kissed him on the cheek and perched her head on his shoulders. 

Willow: It's exactly what I was afraid of. 

Spike: I don't understand... 

Willow: Last night...it was ludicrous of me to ask you to remove your chip. 

-Because the person I love...is the one you are now. 

Spike: I am the same person I was before. And I would never hurt you. 

Willow: I believe you. I really do... 

-I believe the man within you, but I'm afraid the demon you worked so hard to contain will do something you   
will never forgive yourself for. 

Spike: I am a good man, chip or not. 

Willow: I know you believe it, I don't doubt your sincerity either. But the truth is, none of us knows for sure...what will happen   
once your demon is unleashed again...when your chip will no longer tame your dark side. 

Willow: I don't pretend to understand what being a vampire means...or what it feels like. All I need to know...it that you   
don't need to remove your chip...in order for me to love you. 

Spike: Your kind words and affection means everything to me...but I wouldn't be able to stand it...if you doubt what I am. 

Spike: I'm a killer, there's no point denying it. I can't give you a family nor the way of life you deserve. All I can give you   
is love...and a promise to keep you happy. 

-No matter what. 

-And that means with or without the chip. But if you don't believe my promise...it would devastate me as much as the thought   
or hurting you. 

Willow: I wish things were simpler...why couldn't we have met when you were human? I could have been your Cecily... 

Spike: Love is cruel that way. 

Willow: We had so much in common...our mutual kindness...our inner geek... 

Spike: The reason I love you...transcends the similarities I saw with my human self. 

He pulled her body close to him, their chests huddled together, her lips inches from his's. 

Spike: When I'm with you...I don't feel like I'm love's bitch. It's nothing like with Buffy or Dru. 

Spike: Because of that... 

She kissed him, her soft touch burning his lips, igniting every cell of his body. His tongue intertwined itself with hers, their   
mouths locking gently, then passionately. Their hands awkwardly travelling down each other's necks, backs and buttocks. 

When their eyes met, a mutual smile greeted their lips as they both acknowledge the unusual vibe between them. 

"It's just...a really long time has passed since I've been intimate with a man..." stuttered Willow. 

Spike: Plus...you're so much more delicate than the other women I've been with...I wouldn't want to mess things up...and the   
chip would fry me if I somehow hurt you in the process... 

Willow: When we're ready...right? 

Spike was obviously the one who had the harder time hiding his slight disappointment as he answered: 

-Right. 

He stumbled backwards and noticed the platter he left on the table. 

Spike: Not that I'm not enjoying this delicious moment of sexual tension between us... 

Willow: You're right, the food is going to spoil. 

She seemed to hesitate a bit between the various dishes present. 

"Apple pie?" inquisited Willow, a healthy smile on her face. 

*********************************************************************************************   
  


They spent the next few hours conversing about life, each insisting on learning more about the other's tastes, interests, ambitions...   
Time fleeted as Spike and Willow shared their past, present and future... 

"First impressions?", repeated Spike in a slightly annoyed tone. 

Willow: You know...what you thought of me when we first met. 

Spike: You do realize...this was eons before I was chipped right? You weren't even a redhead back then, if memory serves me right... 

Willow: Fine then...do you want me to begin? 

Spike: Honestly, I'd rather we change the subject... 

Willow: I didn't now if the hair bleaching was intentionnal or just an unfortunate consequence of not having a reflection (because vampires   
can't see themselves in a mirror). 

Of course, she uttered those words in the most cheerful way possible. 

Acknowledging what she was trying to do here... 

Spike: You looked like the kind of person that would apologize when someone steps on your foot. 

Willow: The bad boy act? A cheap imitation of Angelus. 

Spike: That geeky persona and Ned Flanders saintly attitude... 

-...was so cute I didn't know whether I should bite you or hug you. 

Willow: And that suave and penetrating stare...made me weak in the knees. 

-You were so seductive...when you weren't so damn frightening. 

They both smiled contently. Spike and Willow talked like this for several more hours, eventually exchanging memories   
of each other's childhood. 

Spike: Wow...I had no idea you were such a big cry-baby back then. 

Willow: Yea...a lot of kids teased me. Thank God, there was Xander...he was like a big brother to me. 

Spike: Just goes to shows how cruel humans are...that they'll prey on the kindest and purest ones...it's downright sickening. 

Willow: We all make mistakes, especially children. People change. Cordelia did, so did Faith... 

-...and you. 

Spike: Still, I can't see the good in everyone. 

Willow: You will, as long as you have faith in mankind. 

Spike: As long as you have faith in it...so will I.   
  


*******************************************************************************************   


Revello Drive, 9:31 PM 

The same breeze that grazed Spike's duster (his black coat) the night before was still present, but this time it was   
wrapped around Willow's body. When it was finally time to go home, Spike insisted on walking there with her. His   
overprotective attitude was certainly a bit smothering, but oddly it felt cozy and reminded her of home...and her   
the fond memories of her early years. 

"The streets are so empty at this time of the night", noticed Willow. 

"Thank the Slayer for that, keeping the demon population in check", replied Spike. 

They walked, huddled to each other, hand to hand. 

Willow: I'm worried. Living in the face of danger all these years...made me forget what the world will be like   
if people like Buffy, Angel, you or me aren't around to protect the helpless. 

Spike: That's why you ressurected her, remember? 

Willow: With Buffy getting more and more invested in her own life...and without Giles, what will we do if someone   
like Glory tries to end the world? Will we be able to prevent it? 

Spike: There's no real answer to that...we will just have to wait and see. 

Willow: You're right...as usual. 

Willow: We need someone strong...even stronger than Buffy. Someone capable of protecting everyone from harm. So   
nice people like Jenny, Kendra...even Joyce, won't ever have to suffer. 

Spike: ...not even God can do that, Will. Unless that someone can raise the dead, magically mind-wipe the sadness and turmoil   
out of a person's heart...and can actually hurt a hellgod... 

He glanced at Willow, concerned...at what her reaction would be. 

She simply smiled at him... 

A smile devoid of impure thoughts...and whose innocence is so profound it comforted and distraught him   
at the same time.   


***************************************************************************************** 

2 Hours later... 

Spike was sitting in his crypt, dropping his pencil as he finished writing the final sentence of his letter to Willow. 

An elderly man, clothed in an elegant Armani suit, was waiting for him on the door. 

"Linwood..." muttered Spike. 

"We're leaving now", started the head of Special Projects division of Wolfram & Hart. 

Spike: Keep your pants on, mate. 

After carefully putting the letter in an open enveloppe, he softly kissed it, and set it on the table. 

Linwood: I hope you won't show needless signs of humanity like that when the time comes... 

-...to complete your end of the bargain. 

Spike: Piss off. 

-I always keep my word. 

Linwood: That's what I like to hear. 

Spike got up and headed towards the door, his only certitude is that the next time he'll come back to Sunnydale, he'll finally   
have the answers he had been searching for. 

Linwood: Ready to feel whole again? 

He was rudely pushed away by Spike as they got out of the crypt and mounted the helicopter. 

Spike: I was born ready.   
  
  
  
  


**End of Part 3**

***************************************************************************************   
  
  
  


***(click here to go back)   
In the season 5 episode "Fool For Love", some of the flashbacks of Spike were only going in his mind, such the nancy-boy William parts and the parts   
where Cecily told him off. He only told her the parts where he killed the slayers. Piece of proof: 

Spike: What can I say? Some of us are born bad.   
The scene then cuts to a very wimpy human Spike. He wants Buffy to believe that he was born a rebel, when in fact he wasn't. Besides, what kind of guy   
tries to win a girl's heart by showing humiliating flashbacks of himself?   


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Author's note: 

This is definitely the turning point of the story. When I started writing the the first 2 parts I didn't know where it was going to   
lead...but this direction is very different from anything I could have imagined. 2 key factors changed it: the final events in   
"Seeing Red" and the way the dark Willow arc was handled in the last 3 episodes. I didn't want to make a tragic story, and I certainly   
hated the way the writers dealt with Willow's magic addiction storyline (not the mention the end of "Grave", blech). 

So what can you expect from the following chapters? My own take on the dark Willow arc, and in my version, Spike will be   
there (that take Mutant Enemy!), the cast of Angel will play a role in it, and so will Tara... 

Ambitious? I dig the challenge. 

As always...feedback is the heart of the reason I try to maintain a high quality level of writing. Any comments, criticism   
you have, send it to me at thatvietguy@hotmail.com . Reply is guaranteed, rain or shine...   
Pce 

Dukester   
  



	3. Chapter 3: Devil's Requiem

Quick summary: Memories of what transpired the night before...and a taste of what's to come. 

PART IV "Devil's Requiem" 

PS: Certain characters of "Angel The Series" plays key roles in this episode, so if you want to be up to date   
check out http://zeroduke.tripod.com/Fanfiction/wolframhart/summary2.html   


*********************************************************************   
  


Unforgiving rain kept pouring and pouring as Spike rushed to the crypt, in dire need of shelter from quite possibly   
the biggest storm this town has ever seen. 

On his right, he could see masses of debris, random piles of rocks and bricks where lightning struck. Another   
bolt of lightning landed a few meters from where he was standing, it's impact shaking the very ground he   
was standing on. 

Needless to say, he wasn't about to stand around and find out just how good a conductor for electricity   
dead skin is. 

"Not many cars out here, or people for that matter", noticed Spike as he blazed through the streets of   
Sunnydale. 

-Makes sense...only wankers would risk their necks playing peek-a-boo with the bloody storm. 

"Unless they had a damn good reason to go out in the first place", corrected himself. 

"Finally!", let out Spike as he was only a couple dozen feet away from his humble abode. While he took a step   
forward, he noticed that smoke emanated from the powerlines...and that the very posts that were supporting those   
electrical lines were stacked like dominos, flames spewing wildly where lightning struck it. 

Suddenly, one of the lines exploded, and sparks of fire rained from the sky. 

"You have got to be kidding me..." muttered Spike as he did his best to evade the blazing bits of flame threathening   
his life. 

As soon as the last spark hit the ground, it incinerated the grass, only to be extinguished by the torrential rain   
a few seconds later. 

-That was close. 

Quickly, he dashed to the entrance of his crypt, taking a much needed sigh of relief as heavy gobs of water dripped   
from his wet clothes and hair. 

As he spun around to return to his sanctuary, he took one last look at the damage the storm had caused.   
While the powerlines were anything but functionnal, electrical sparks risked to blow up any second now   
if it should come in contact of rain. 

Best case scenario: the crypt will be out of power for weeks, and the damage will limit itself only to the   
surface areas. 

-At any rate...it's going to be ugly tomorrow...   


********************************************************************* 

"Why am I not surprised?", mumbled Spike as he wandered his way into a lightless crypt, taking uncertain   
steps in total darkness. With no other sense of orientation...than the random objects scattered in the room. 

"Wait a sec...", noted Spike as he pulled out his lighter. A tiny burst of fire ignited and lit up the room. He proceeded   
to light up the crypt lanterns. 

-Finally found a use for these. Electricity is definitely handier, in any case. 

As he set himself on the couch, he felt a wave of uneasyness overcome him. 

-This can't be right... 

He felt multiple jabs on his ribs, and before he even had the time to acknowledge the pain, a powerful roundhouse   
kick sent him flying a few feet away. 

Unconsciously, he put his game face on the second he hit the floor. 

-What the hell? 

As soon as he got up, his face was slammed against the wall, tearing cracks into it. 

Although he could unmistakably say that a hand was crushing his skull at this moment, all he could see   
in front of him...was an empty room. 

"The Kaghami Order", thought Spike as he sank his fangs deep into his invisible assaillant's palm. The latter   
screamed in agony as he withdrew his bleeding hand. 

- Annoying buggers...demon ninja clan, if I remember correctly... 

He closed his eyes and lunged forward. The air was ripped apart as a swift punch was delivered...and intercepted by the vampire. 

- The only thing that I need...is the smell of blood in order to pinpoint _exactly_ where you are...and the sound you make   
during your attack in order to intercept it. 

With that, he twisted his opponent's arm, tearing bone and muscle tissue, until it became soft enough to rip away from   
the demon's shoulder. 

Anguished yells of pain filled the room. 

-Whoever sent you here...musn't know the first thing about vampires. At least now I'll have a much easier time   
tracking you down. 

Suddenly, the sound of gunshots interrupted his victory speech and the searing screams of anguish slowly   
died out...until only the smoke emanating from the pistol could be heard. 

"Well, that was fun", exclaimed a sharply dressed brunette standing on the entrance of the crypt.   


********************************************************************* 

Soon afterwards, an elderly man stepped inside, his wardrobe quite similar to the young woman's. 

"You have to understand...", started the old man. 

-We had to make sure your skills didn't diminish since the last time we saw you. 

Spike: Not a problem...since we've never met before. 

"Your last visit to Los Angeles caught our attention, to put it bluntly", continued the old man. 

Spike: So that's it then ... I suppose this is the point where you present yourselves. 

- Because torture is so much more personal when I know my victims's names. 

Old man: No point making iddle threats, we know you can't harm humans. 

Spike growled menacingly, baring his blood soaked teeth and piercing him with his yellow eyes as he dashed   
towards the old man. He was inches away from him within seconds. 

The elderly man recoiled back in terror, his back huddled against the stony wall. 

- Lilah! 

Spike turned towards the young woman, and noticed that she didn't flinch from his assault. He also   
realized that the barrel of the gun was pointed straight in between his eyes... 

Lilah: It's ok Linwood, he's just faking it. 

"Don't...move", ordered the woman, as she was focused on the vampire. 

Spike: How about that... I haven't seen many "take-charge" women in a good while. 

He disappeared from her sight and reappeared behind her. 

"I can see...who has the real balls between the two of you", whispered Spike as he leaned close to her ear. 

She pushed him back, and cooly declared: 

-Angel and I play that cat and mouse game every week... 

-Next to him...you're little more than a helpless kitty. 

Spike: Obviously you know as little about me...than you know about kittens. 

Spike: Because I sure gave your boss a run for his money, haven't I ? 

Linwood regained his composure and reajusted his tie. 

Linwood: Try something like that again...and you'll get to know the fine art of torture, you amateur. 

Spike: Right...which brings me to my next questions. 

Spike: 1) Who are you, 2) What do you want, and 3) Get out. 

"Honestly, I thought we'd pique your curiosity when we mentionned Angel", started Lilah. 

Spike: Don't give a bleeding damn about old Gel Boy. 

Lilah: Fair enough...I'll have to go through it another way. 

Lilah: What is it about Sunnydale girls that have you high and mighty vampires so whipped? 

She definitely caught his attention now... 

Spike: I'm not in love with the Slayer, that's Broody's department. 

Lilah: We couldn't care less about which one you want. All we are interested in...is what you need. 

Spike: You couldn't possibly... 

Lilah: Has something to do with a restraining chip that a certain covert government faction put in you. 

- Am I far off...or am I right on track? 

Spike was dumbfounded, as he flashed back to the events that unfolded earlier, to Willow...to her promise... 

Lilah: You're thinking about her right now, aren't you? That perky redhead... 

Spike: How do you know... 

Spike: Just who the hell are you people???!!! 

Linwood: We're Wolfram & Hart. 

********************************************************************* 

Spike: That doesn't answer my bleeding question. 

Linwood: All you need to know...is that we have the means necessary to remove your chip. Quid Pro Quo, of course. 

Spike: You do something for me...I do something for you. 

Linwood: That's right. 

Spike: The answer is no. 

Linwood: You didn't even hear what we were going to ask of you yet! 

Spike: Don't care. I have everything I could possibly want already...plus I don't trust any of you. 

Linwood: What about the need to go back to the way you were? To hunt, and feed off humans again?   
To settle the score with the Slayer? 

Spike: I adapted. It's not worth the risk. I have too much to lose. 

Lilah: Like the love of a good woman? 

Spike couldn't respond...even if he had all the time in the world. 

Lilah: You're pathetic. 

"Shut your sodding mouth!", yelled the vampire. 

Lilah: Guess there's no use reasoning with a lovelorn puppy. 

Spike: I said... 

Lilah: You know...our oracles were fixated on her long before we were interested in you. We even saw potential   
in her as a force we can recruit. 

Spike: You don't know the first thing about her, do you? 

Lilah: You saw it firsthand tonight. What kind of darkness is in her. It would make even Angelus quiver. Someone must   
have told you what she was like as a vampire. Or how she was approached by D'Hoffryn. 

Spike: Yet the kindness she is capable of...is enough to encompass the hate I have in me. 

Lilah: But you can't help her...not the way you are now, anyway. 

Spike: Are we about done here? 

Lilah: You can see it. She is drowning into loneliness and sorrow. Because you can't give yourself   
completely to her. because of the chip. 

Spike: And I believe we're through. 

Linwood was visibly losing patience. 

Linwood: Forget it Lilah. He's not worth our time. 

Lilah looked more annoyed at Spike's thick-headedness than anything else. 

Lilah: He wouldn't be of any use to us anyway. Too pitiful to face his true nature... 

As the lawyers stepped out of the crypt. 

"Wait", ushered a voice hidden in the depths of the room. 

"Someone else is here, but why couldn't I notice it?", thought Spike. 

Unless they didn't need to breathe. 

-Hello, dear Spike. 

Spike: Dru... 

********************************************************************* 

The dark haired vampire stepped out of the shadows, twirling sensually...seductively. 

"Mesmerizingly...", managed to let out Spike. 

Lilah: Forget it Dru. The whipped puppy won't play along. 

"Hush", snarled the female vampire. 

Spike: Where do you know these looneys from, Dru? 

Drusilla: They're the ones who brought back mummy. 

Spike: Darla...bloody priceless. 

Drusilla leaned towards him, caressing his neck with her delicate fingers. 

Spike: Now pet...let's have none of that. 

His joyful expression quickly turned into a rictus of pain as he felt her nails digging into his neck, drawing blood. 

He escaped her hold, and looked at her confusedly as he tried to stop the bleeding. 

Drusilla: What are you? 

Spike: You're going to find out soon enough... 

He vamped out for the second time of the night. 

Drusilla: I'm not looking to fight you, lover. 

Spike: Pity...because I am. 

With that, he lunged at her. He stopped midway as he completely lost sight of her... 

Drusilla: Where are you Spike? I can't see you... 

Spike closed his eyes and delivered a roundhouse kick that connected with Drusilla's ribs...but   
not before her knuckle met with his backside. 

Spike collapsed on the floor, knowing he won't be able to get back up before at least a minute.   
Meanwhile, Drusilla was sent flying against the wall. 

Drusilla: I thought I understood you the last time I came to Sunnydale. 

- I so wanted us to be a family again. 

Spike: I moved the hell on. 

Drusilla slowly got up while Spike was still pinned to the floor. 

Drusilla: You can lie to yourself. You can lie to the naughty lawyers. You can even lie to that precious   
little witch of yours. 

-But you can never lie to me. 

"Look into my eyes", purred the female vampire. 

Her eyes...black dots that poke the inner depths of your heart and mind. 

Drusilla: I see it all so clearly now... 

"You know the lawyers are telling the truth", whispered Drusilla so softly that only vampires can hear. 

-You're afraid...because you know you'll hurt her. 

Spike: You're wrong. 

Drusilla: Where are you Spike? 

Spike just stared at her dumbfoundedly. 

Drusilla: You're yearning to get out...to be free of the prison man has made for you. 

Spike: Nothing new here... 

She slapped him...with a speed and intensity that shocked the blond vampire. 

Drusilla: Shhh...I don't want to hear you. I want to listen to Spike... 

Keeping his mouth shut while she probed his mind, Spike noticed that the two lawyers stepped outside, in order   
to give the vampires more space and intimacy. 

"Hell of a plan B, at any rate...", thought Spike. 

He was broken out of his reflexion by Drusilla's incessant clapping. 

Drusilla: Come back inside. 

A few seconds later, the two lawyers reemerged. 

Drusilla: He wants in, to prove himself to her. He is truly convinced that this is his real self. 

-He just doesn't trust humans very much...you people remind him of the government boys. 

-Yet...things changed a bit when he learned that you ressurected Darla. He doesn't doubt your skills...just   
your intentions. 

Linwood: Why didn't he ask then? 

Drusilla: ...because he is a stubborn, stupid boy. 

Spike stood up. 

Spike: Let's get one thing clear: the reason I want the chip out is because of Willow. I'm   
not doubting myself at any measure. 

Drusilla: Lies. 

Spike: This means nothing to me. I'd just be as content living with the chip, if it means being with her. 

Lilah: You don't have to convince anyone here. We. Don't. Care. 

Spike: I also want to know if the risk is worth taking. 

Linwood: Finally...we're getting somewhere. 

Drusilla: Ooh! I want to tell this story. 

Spike: I'm all ears, pet. 

He looked at her quizically for an instant, unable to comprehend why she was so excited. 

Drusilla: Mummy and Daddy have been especially naughty this year. 

- We have a brother...   


**********************************************************************************   


Spike could barely believe what has been expositionned in the past half hour. 

Spike: There's definitely a mistake...vampires can't have children. 

Lilah: Trust me...none were more surprised than the happy parents. 

Spike: ...Fine. So the old bloke has a kid. Sorry I missed the baby shower. 

- Why should any of us care? 

Drusilla looked shocked and hurt. 

Drusilla: We have a new relative...and Mummy died. 

Spike: Yea, again. See how vigourously I don't care. 

Linwood: Our interests in the matter is of no concern to you. All you have to do is keep your   
end of the bargain. 

Spike: Still, since I'm the one who gets to put his ass on the line... 

Lilah: Alright...if you insist. 

- The reason we want you to kidnap Angel's newborn son...is because his presence could trigger the   
"happiness clause" of the curse. 

As she made it to the words "happiness clause", she did those quotation marks with her fingers. 

Spike: So what? Then we get Angelus. 

Spike: Granted, I don't really look forward to seeing that guy torture me for what I did for him last time. 

-But isn't getting Angel in the dark side of the Force...pretty much what you want? And that goes   
for Dru too. 

Linwood: We have no interest in Angelus. What we want is a souled vampire that's allied with us.   
The one that was prophesized to play a major role in the impending Apocalypse. 

Lilah: In short, we want him miserable, alienated from his friends, wallowing in guilt, revenge, self-pity   
and pain...but alive and souled. 

Drusilla came forward and clutched Spike's arm. 

-As for me...I'd rather have my real Spike back than Daddy. We can raise little Connor to do amazing things... 

Spike separated himself from her grip. 

Spike: Raise him? 

Lilah: As long as Angel thinks his son is dead...you can have him. That's Dru's payoff. 

Spike: You're saying as if getting past Angel is a piece of cake. 

Lilah: It will be...if you sneak in his room from outside while Drusilla and her crew distracts Angel   
and his co-workers. 

Spike turned to face Drusilla. 

Spike: I'm not going to owe you anything. 

Drusilla: You'll eat those wretched words...once we get your chip out. 

Spike: Don't count on it. 

Lilah: We tried to recruit Faith for the job...but Angel's repentance lectures seemed to have gotten through   
to the Slayer. 

Spike: Everyone in your distraction squad can go to hell for all I care...amd that includes Dru, Angel and that   
prissy bint from Sunnydale. 

Drusilla: I love it when you talk like that... 

As she motionned to approach him, he pushed her back. 

Spike: Don't make me knock you unconscious again. 

Dru pouted slightly. 

Spike: So...when's the mission? 

Lilah: In 4 days...we'll have a have a helicopter bring you to LA tomorrow. 

Spike: Why tomorrow? 

Lilah: You are going to say goodbye to your sweetheart, right? 

Spike: Didn't peg you as the sympathetic kind. 

Lilah: I think ahead, that's all. 

Spike: And the chiperectomy? 

Linwood: Two days before. 

Spike: So this means... 

Linwood: You'll be able to kill anyone who stands in the way of Connor, human or otherwise. 

Spike: I see... 

Linwood: So...do we have a deal? 

Spike glanced at the old man suspiciously. Here he was, about to make a decision that will alter the course   
of his existence forever...and for what purpose? 

Unless you do it for anyone other than yourself, you'll keep slipping until you reach the point of no return. 

Something he said to Willow mere hours ago. 

-All I want...is for her to be happy. 

-I can't protect her as I am right now. 

-Unless I'm true to her, I'll lose her. 

-Do I really know what I'm capable of? 

-Were Dru and Willow right? Is the chip concealing a heartless demon? 

Then he was fixated on one, single question. 

-Will I be able to control myself...or end up hurting the one person I cherish the most in this sodding world? 

There was only _one_ way to find out. 

Spike: I...accept. 

Linwood extended his hand in reconnaissance. 

Linwood: We look forward to doing business with you. 

Spike: Pleasure's all _yours_, mate. 

Linwood withdrew his hand, grinning exasperately. 

Linwood: Be here at 2130 sharp. 

-That is all. 

He exited without looking backwards. 

"Guess my work is done", said Lilah as she prepared to follow her superior. 

As she was about to leave, she felt a strong hand grab her arm. 

Spike: Since you're the one who seemingly orchestrated this brilliant plan. 

-What makes you so sure that I won't turn on you the second I get chipped? 

She looked at him oddly for a second, before removing a tazer from her suit with her free hand   
and jamming it at maximum intensity in Spike's ribs. 

Lilah: Because I have faith in your instinct...the one that keeps you from doing idiotic things. 

Spike chuckled lightly while wrapping his hands around his stomach. 

Lilah: Which doesn't mean I'll mind being proven wrong. 

Spike: You just might be. 

Lilah: After receiving death threats from Angel on a weekly basis...your pathetic attempts don't even amuse me. 

Spike: I'm not Angel. 

Lilah: That's right...you're not. 

Spike finally managed to get up. 

Spike: Heh...I like you. 

Lilah: That's funny...because I can't stand you. 

She left the crypt as cooly as she entered. 

As Spike turned around, he noticed he was alone. 

The echo...a message inscribed in the wind. 

"The next time I see you, you'll be reborn. Then...we'll make the Slayer and the witch pay for what they did   
to you...to Angelus...to Darla...to our family. Miss Edith can't wait to see you again. 

Spike: Don't be so sure, luv. Once our mission is over, the first person that _Spike_ will kill...is you. 

With that, he jumped into his coffin and dozed off to sleep. Regardless of what's going to unfold in the   
next days...this will be the last time he'll be able to get a good night's sleep...before his reality   
will be redefined.   
  


******************************************************************************* 

2 days later. 

9:32 AM 

-Spike? Where are you? 

Willow had spent the last 5 minutes searching the crypt for the elusive vampire, including the   
lower catacombs. 

Did something happen to him? 

-He isn't here... 

"That pig...", mumbled Willow while she sobbed quietly. 

She set herself on the couch while drying her tears. 

-I hate feeling like this. Everything... 

"Enough", Willow commanded herself. 

-It's not worth crying over. 

As she was about to leave, she noticed the thin enveloppe lying on the table. 

It read... 

-To Fuzzy Lamb, from Blondy Bear. 

"Spike...", pleasantly whispered Willow. 

* * *

First of all, I'm sorry. I'd rather stake myself then see the look on your face when you realized I wasn't there.   
You can kick my ass when I get back, I won't hold it against you. I deserve it. 

God, I wanted to tell you this in person. But I know that you would keep insisting to come along   
until I accept...but it's something I have to do alone. 

So...be angry at me. I'll understand if you won't forgive. I know how much you hate being abandonned. 

But please...never lose that gentle spirit of yours. I don't want to imagine what the world would be   
turning into...if the kindest person I've ever met lost faith in the world. There's more to life than pain.   
I hope you know that. And I hope you realize just how much your friends love you, even if it's not   
always obvious. 

Love, Spike 

PS: You're not alone. 

* * *

Willow stared blankly at the piece of paper. 

- It's not that I can't live without you... 

- It's just that...the way you make me feel when I'm with you... 

- it made me truly happy. 

It was her turn to press her lips on the thin piece of paper. 

-Please come back to me... 

Before there's no going back...for either of us. 

As she stepped outside of the crypt, the rays of sunshine beamed down on her young face. 

-Wherever you are...I hope the sun is smiling on you too... 

With that, she slammed the door shut.   
  
  


End Of Part 4   


* * *

  
  
  
  
  
  


Authors Note: Expect a relatively long wait before my next chapters...since story development will take precedence over the W/S stuff. 

I'll be focusing on my 2 other stories, Chronicles Of The Living Dead and South Park Meets The Hellmouth, in the meantime. 

Honestly, even if I'm psyched about writing the whole Wolfram & Hart / Spike side story and Willow's descent into darkness, I'd   
much rather write the lovey dovey part of it all...but the writer part of me compels me to write the rest of the story until I get back   
to that :( . 

Be sure to check the 2 other stories in the meantime, all 3 of them have really different moods and atmospheres to them...   
althought they're all written with the same quality. 

As always, emails are at thatvietguy@hotmail.com 

Until next time... 

Pce 

Dukester   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



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